I have to begin by apologizing to my readers for being so erratic in my posting. I am sorry for not posting regularly.
I am still struggling with my father's death. I have realized that I am still working on grieving my Grammy who died 5 yrs ago in March. I can't get anyplace in grieving my dad when I am still trying to deal with my Grammy's death. Grieving a death can be much harder for a person with a tbi. It took nearly a year for me to stop forgetting completely that my Grammy was dead. Each time I remembered it was like I had just found out. It wasn't quite as severe with my father since I was there in the hospital with him enforcing his decisions on his health care proxy. Even though I fully support the decisions he made and my own proxy form has similar decisions on it I still have a degree of guiltI am still working through. Having to decide to turn off machines would have been worse but refusing them was hard. I was also the one who made the decision to switch him to comfort cate. It was the best decision for him but still a hard one to make. As the one who has taken cats and dog to be euthanized on one level it feels a bit like the same decision. That day my dad's diagnoses had changed from mild emphysema, several mild strokes and Alzheimer's to add leukemia, ling cancer and fast moving frontal lobe dementia. He could no longer speak and even his sensory nerves seemed to be failing.
He had extremely sensitive feet, touching them had always been dangerous yet that last few days he wanted fingernails dragged on them. I'd been kicked few times over the years. Having small fiber neuropathy myself it is possible he had it as well since mine is genetic.
I'm just really sad and not improving anytime soon. I will post when. I can but many days just getting out of bed uses my days energy.
Sorry.
I am still struggling with my father's death. I have realized that I am still working on grieving my Grammy who died 5 yrs ago in March. I can't get anyplace in grieving my dad when I am still trying to deal with my Grammy's death. Grieving a death can be much harder for a person with a tbi. It took nearly a year for me to stop forgetting completely that my Grammy was dead. Each time I remembered it was like I had just found out. It wasn't quite as severe with my father since I was there in the hospital with him enforcing his decisions on his health care proxy. Even though I fully support the decisions he made and my own proxy form has similar decisions on it I still have a degree of guiltI am still working through. Having to decide to turn off machines would have been worse but refusing them was hard. I was also the one who made the decision to switch him to comfort cate. It was the best decision for him but still a hard one to make. As the one who has taken cats and dog to be euthanized on one level it feels a bit like the same decision. That day my dad's diagnoses had changed from mild emphysema, several mild strokes and Alzheimer's to add leukemia, ling cancer and fast moving frontal lobe dementia. He could no longer speak and even his sensory nerves seemed to be failing.
He had extremely sensitive feet, touching them had always been dangerous yet that last few days he wanted fingernails dragged on them. I'd been kicked few times over the years. Having small fiber neuropathy myself it is possible he had it as well since mine is genetic.
I'm just really sad and not improving anytime soon. I will post when. I can but many days just getting out of bed uses my days energy.
Sorry.
I’d learned early that life was unpredictable. For some that made them stronger, but others it made them weaker. I was somewhere in the middle, teetering on the invisible line. Until I met him, and he shoved me off.
I couldn’t explain why I wanted her. I just knew she’d be mine, regardless of her past and mine. Even when they crossed in a way I could ‘t have predicted, my need for her never wavered.
If you can hold on through the rain you’ll learn some of the best moments in life are . . . unexpected.
***This is a college romance with a slight twist.
New York Times and USA Today Bestselling author Nicole Blanchard lives in Florida with her family and their menagerie of animals. She chooses each day to chase her own fairy tale even if they contain their fair share of dragons. She is married to her best friend and owns her own business.
Nicole survives on a diet of too many books and substantial amounts of root beer and slim jims. When not reading, she’s lavishing attention on her family or inhaling every episode of The Walking Dead and The Big Bang Theory.
About GABRIEL (Book #1):
Twenty years ago, Leah Bannon’s beloved Uncle Richard vanished without a trace. Leah, now a private investigator, begins to suspect it was murder. When she reopens the cold case, Gabriel Devlin—the man she loves but can never have—inexplicably stands in her way.
Only four people know the truth about Richard’s mysterious disappearance—Gabriel and three childhood friends...who have all sworn to take that secret to the grave. But a hidden enemy wants those shocking secrets brought to light...even if he has to kill to make it happen. After experiencing an unimaginable loss two years ago, Gabriel refuses to put himself through the pain of loving someone who could be gone in an instant. But as he thwarts Leah’s investigation at every turn—both to keep his friends’ pact, and to keep her safe from danger—the sexy PI makes it impossible for him to protect his secrets. Or his heart...
